This topic never really was my thing hey. I was one of those people that would judge quietly if someone was being over the top, Obviously not anymore, but my old self used to judge. Over the years I learnt that how I judge others is ultimately how I judge myself. So I stopped. It took some time. It took some work. I had to first identify the judgement as it was being made and then tell myself to accept and love rather than judge the person. What happened was, I began to see people in a better light for who they actually are and at the same time I began to accept and love myself for who I am. So whether you are cray cray and like to jump up and down or quiet and avoid people it doesn’t matter to me anymore. What matters is that you are being true to yourself. This behaviour change for me was radical on its own. It took ALOT.
I have been learning about radical change and how it confuses your brain and breaks the patterns of thought that your brain have tuned itself into. I like this idea. I see how it can work, because even when I try the slightest change to disrupt my thought pattern it works. I hate cold anything. This morning I turned my normal warm shower into a ice cold one. Why? Because I wanted to see what will happen. And because I read I read that its good for you. I also heard that Ice baths are good for you but ill take a cold a cold shower first thank you very much. Well… I got the fright of my life, and It tortured me for about a minute, but I stuck it out, and then the water slowly started feeling refreshing. The result: My energy is up, my mind is alert and my day has been very productive so far even though it just started. Listen, that cold shower woke me up like I didn’t expect. So much so that I may do it more often. Who knew…
I have also been learning to let go when it comes to my body movements. I don’t always have to be controlled and prim and proper. I don’t have to worry about what people are going to say. If I Like a song, whether it be in the grocery store or in my car I’m going to dance to it. If I feel low in energy and jumping up and down is going to boost me up and fill my energy tanks then I’m going to get up and jump. If I feel myself slipping into a slumpy mood then changing my posture , standing, walking or even shouting out loud to change my state is going to happen.
Radical changes are needed if I am going to be in my peak state most of the time. Radical behaviour too. The world around me will have to watch and deal with what they see, but I’m loving this new burst of energy that I have found. I’m loving that when I feel down I can just move my body in a way that will immediately lift me up. I love that I have found freedom in this and that it takes me one step closer to the freedom that I search for.
I love that I am at a stage that I can actually see the steps that I have taken over time coming together to finally to create the life that I envision. I love that even as my vision for myself changes the work that I do on myself is never lost.
The next step will be tougher, the next step is breaking free of my fear of being shut down, of being rejected in the workplace, of doing live videos because I cant edit them, of being in front of a video camera in general and still delivering like nobody is watching and of being able to deliver myself as easily and authentically on my podcast even if there is another person in the room. Its not going to be easy for me. But like my ice cold shower this morning. I was uncomfortable for a short while, and after some endurance the discomfort disappeared and my body adjusted to the temperature of the cold water. So I will adjust. I have to remember when the fear is in front of me that I will adjust.
I love being here with you, I love sharing my growth with you and I’m so grateful for each and every one of you.
Love and Light